Ruben Toledo Remembers His Beloved Late Wife, Designer Isabel Toledo
Last night, friends and family gathered at the Baryshnikov Arts Center in Manhattan to celebrate the life and career of designer Isabel Toledo. Toledo’s death from breast cancer on August 26 came as a shock to the international fashion community who regarded her as a legendary figure for her sense of craft and aesthetic rigor, and her possession of that rare magic that elevates a designer from mere trendsetter to something more timeless.
The speakers, who included Wendy Goodman, James Kaliardos, and Kim Hastreiter, all spoke of Toledo’s achievements in fashion, and her deft ability to transform even the most pedestrian of fabrics (plain cotton, raw denim, silk jersey) into fluid architectural wonders. Others spoke of the significance of her accomplishments as a woman of color: a Cuban immigrant who went on to show in Paris, become the subject of numerous museum exhibitions, and dress former First Lady Michelle Obama for the inauguration in 2008. There were performances by friends such as Joey Arias and the puppeteer Basil Twist. The evening concluded with a letter to Isabel from her husband the artist Ruben Toledo, read aloud to a weeping audience by family friend Whoopi Goldberg. Every speaker had noted that Isabel’s life was exemplary for two reasons: her innate design genius and the extraordinary, bottomless love that she had shown and known in her marriage to Ruben. Below is Ruben’s letter to Isabel in its entirety.
My Isabel Isabel,
I love to say your name twice: It rings like a bell inside my head, so soothing and gentle and hopeful. You know how well we fit together—like two misfit puzzle pieces that magically unite forever. Your mystical essence is still clinging to me like my second skin that feels so good. I remain wrapped up in your cocoon of warmth and kindness that took you 45 years to weave around us. I am protected in your meticulous folds and hidden pleats—your scent still lingers inside my lining.
We always trusted each others’ moves and rhythms. How should I interpret your sudden turn and departure? Should I try to keep the same rhythm going—keep the beat best as I can? Or should I fall into the offbeat unpredictable soulful conga drums that you love so much with their own ancient and solid vibrations?
I will listen to whatever new beat you wish me to follow as long as it leads me to you.
Were you a dream? If you hadn’t left so many of your sensitive genius patterns behind—such a fertile and creative landscape you carefully constructed—I might think you were only something my imagination invented. Because of your lightness and ethereal nature and fearlessness with life, your wide open heart allows everyone and everything in. That’s what makes me so protective of you. This is your mystery. You are soft as a cloud and solid as stone.
Thank you for allowing me to enjoy the many versions of you. My Izzy: the fun loving prankster and practical joker—practical because you always were and joker because you loved to laugh. My Izzy: so organized, clear, strong, courageous; so great at making do and so great at making everything you do look easy and elegantly effortless—making genius out of nothing. My Isabel: with your elegant regal head—your royal and serene forehead—a beautiful mind like no other. Your soulful and honest eyes that I plunged deep into and never came back from. Thank you for letting me in. I am still deep in there, floating in your heavenly essence. I see everything and everyone through your unforgettable eyes.
I love you.
Your Ruben
Originally Appeared on Vogue
